I've spent the last three hours looking through every nook and cranny in my car and my house for the pink slip to my car and, baby, it's gone.
I just don't know how I'm thirty years old and I still do this. I have so many parking tickets. I'm so far behind on my student loans. I'm pretty far behind on my studio payments too. I think about all the things I ignore because they stress me out so much and I wish I still felt awful enough to want to die. Honestly, knowing I was like 3 steps from trying to die was a comfort, because it was a solution. Now I'm kind of even keeled and it's not an option. It just isn't, so what am I going to do.
I just texted my mom about the slip and she was very understanding, but I feel her getting less and less okay with my bullshit and I understand. I feel so bad when I think about the kids she's stuck with- two do-nothing artists with debt and excuses.
My mom deserves a better daughter. I can't believe I'm driving across the country for no fucking reason now. I wish I was taking a plane.
Why did my mom move to Missi-fucking-sippi?
