You shouldn't wait for people. You shouldn't compromise for people. The only person that matters is you. Once you get you settled, then take care of others. Like an airplane.
So, you already made your bed, lie in it. But don't do that again.
He's not having a great day. I sent him an email of encouragement, but I don't know how good that is. I have been slowly turning off my powers of empathy for the past couple of years, which is really helping me cope with life, but is really shit for being a friend, being a daughter. A friend tells me they're having a rough time... I don't even know what to do anymore. "Crime...boy, I don't know." I'm Robert Richie when I should be trying to be Jed Bartlett.
I miss them. I miss my mom, she is my goodness I think.
I miss my dad, and I think he is dying. I think that I'm not supposed to think that. I'm supposed to understand that he's getting better. But I need a number, I need a stage that this is at. Stage 1, that would be great. Well, not great. But better than stage 4.
I have had this song stuck in my head all day, maybe for several days. I used to watch riverdance as a child again and again. My poor parents. I want to watch it again maybe, it was so fascinating to me, like watching a magic trick. Like being held.